i just don’t care

i’m badly bruised and the times we had are over now. things can’t change , and til the die i die , i’ll remember you . you had my heart , found lost and broken .. opened me up deep , and filled me with lies. left me broken and confused , as all i could do is beg for you . i’m tierd now and the breathe that’s left in my body can’t be wasted on you . stupid lil girl , she couldn’t wait to be fixed . she wasn’t beautiful she was a fool . that fool was me and now i’m no longer a fool , i see right through you and all your bullshit . you can’t bring me down no more.. i’m free .

letting you go.

i can’t let you , i can’t get over you.

i can never listen to my brain.

letting you go, ..

that means ; takin away my everything.

pushing me away , .. yeah well it makes insecure.

talking to other girls,.. it’s complete bullshit if your commiting to me.

you maybe, the worst player ever.

you get caught, the number one thing you’re not suppose to do.

behind my back, is better than in your face, right?..

through it all, in & out.. i can’t get over you.

can we pretend ?

pretending is all that anyone’s good at. if we pretend we don’t have to face the truth is what we all think. but, really what the truth holds is that, if we pretend now the problems become worse & carry on deep, beneath inside us. pretending isn’t just play, it’s really a lie. we shouldn’t say “pretending”, we should be honest & say that we’re lying. pretend isn’t serious nor real .. sometimes i think if i pretend everything’s okay then things will be okay, but it doesn’t work that way. i wonder if my whole life was a lie, to say i was happy my whole life is a lie. i really pretended & acted as though everything was okay so noone would ask questions. i have to pretend to act so hard & strong when really all i want is to have someone hold me & tell me it’s finally okay to let it all out. i’m sick of pretending, but unfortantley i’ll probably always pretend.. for the rest of my life. just remember pretending is a lie. & ALWAYS will be . you can’t remember a lie, but you’ll always remember the truth..

i’m sorry.

i take it back.. i never meant to hurt chu bad.

hurt chu badly now.. i know you’re sad.

i’d do anything to change it back, rewind the time.

the heat of the moment, controlled my actions.

& i ain’t got no man no more.

it’s history.

if we’re meant to be, we’ll be together.

i love you ; but i can’t forever..

                 ^

believe.

-believe cause i see it happen in dreams .

-believe cause you are meant to be .

-kiss me slow & untold here , i’m awake. just believe me.

-believe me & that some things are true.

-believe, that i love you .

kml

the one person i felt close to & i thought she understood me the most , i feel like she’s slipping away . everything is being ripped away from me … maybe i need to be on my own for awhile so i can get better ? but, one of my biggest fears is being alone .. it’s when i actually have to think & become my own person . why do we wanna change , but never do ? because we’re scared . i don’t wanna be scared , but i relized there’s noone to catch you when you’re falling & there’s noone to hear me when i’m calling … but i’m tierd of running from all the bad & never confronting my enemies . like i once heard , ” no pity for a coward .. ” i have to step up & decide what’s best for me & not worry about what others will think for once .